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Homosexuality – Can We Talk About It?
What is Homosexuality?
Homosexuality is a scientific term developed in the late 19th century to describe the new recognition of a particular group of people who have an inborn physical and emotional attraction to peers of their own gender instead of the opposite gender. The term heterosexuality, describing people attracted to the opposite gender, originated at the same time. Human sexuality is a complex issue and involves much more than just to whom one is attracted; it is an integral part of one’s personality and way of seeing and relating to life and other human beings.
How Many of Us in Churches Out There?
Some researchers believe that approximately 10% of the population has a homosexual orientation, but many homosexuals hide ‘in the closet’ for fear of being rejected and persecuted, especially ‘in the church’. Sadly, many of them eventually flee the church because they feel rejected and condemned.
Is Homosexuality a Choice?
Asked in a different way, do you remember when you actively chose to become heterosexual or homosexual? Feelings of human attraction are not a choice. People with a homosexual orientation experience a gradually dawning awareness, usually as they enter adolescence, that their attractions are different from most people around them. As many homosexuals say, “Why would anyone choose to be rejected, hated and alienated from their friends and families?”
Can Homosexuality be Cured?
Authentic, independent medically peer-reviewed research shows virtually no evidence of lasting change. Many who profess their testimony of overcoming homosexuality make this claim in faith that God will make it happen. They may marry a heterosexual and have children, but research shows that most of these people eventually realize that there has been no genuine change in their homosexual orientation. Many homosexuals raised in ‘church going’ homes have spent years pleading with God to change them. They try counselling, ‘change’ programs, aversion therapy and even exorcisms, to no avail. It is cruel to tell them they could change if they just had enough faith or prayed more. This attitude is reminiscent of Christian condemnation in past centuries of left-handed people as being ‘of the devil’. People who are told they lack faith often come to believe that God has rejected them. In despair, some harm themselves or commit suicide.
What Does the Bible Say About Homosexuality?
The Bible does not specifically address the issue of inborn homosexual orientation in the context of committed, monogamous relationships. Homosexuality is neither mentioned in the Ten Commandments nor by Jesus and the prophets. Still, many Christians cite six biblical passages that condemn specific kinds of same-gender behaviour, just as specific kinds of opposite-gender behaviour are also condemned. A significant number of thoughtful, respected church leaders have given serious and prayerful consideration to this subject. When the lens of prejudice is removed, advances in science, psychology and medicine now give the church new tools to view and understand this complex issue as present truth.
Genesis 19:4-9 It is not likely that every man from every part of Sodom was a homosexual. These were probably heterosexual men who intended to gang-rape the strangers who had entered their city. In that culture, given the fact that Lot, also an outsider, had pressed his hospitality on the angels, the inhabitants of Sodom may well have suspected them of being spies. Homosexual rape, or treating someone ‘like a woman’ was the customary way of humiliating enemies in that culture. When later biblical writers describe the sins of Sodom, they do not refer to homosexuality, but to arrogance, in-hospitality, and lack of concern for the poor and needy. (Ezekiel 16:49, Luke 10:12)
Leviticus 18:22, 20:13 Laws found in Leviticus 17:26 concern ritual purity in the daily life of Hebrew society. These laws have been recognized as a discrete entity and designated a ‘Holiness Code’. Moses prefaces Chapter 18 with an injunction to refrain from the following practices of the idolatrous nations of Canaan & Egypt. The intent of laws that forbid mixing two kinds of crops in a field, wearing garments of two kinds of fabric, cross-breeding two kinds of animals, or trimming hair in the fashion of heathen nations, seems to be, either symbolically or in actual practice, separation from the practices of heathen peoples. Penetrative sex of a man, a Canaanite idolatrous practice, was seen as using a man like a woman, a blurring of the distinction between the sexes, and thus to be avoided in maintaining ritual purity. In the New Testament, Paul says that in Christ distinctions between Jews and gentile are done away with. Like circumcision, such ritual laws are no longer required of Christ’s followers. We don’t have authority to choose which laws are still binding.
Romans 1:24-31 Paul’s point in the first three chapters of Romans is that everyone, both gentile and Jew, is a sinner in need of God’s grace. Writing from Corinth, the worship centre of Aphrodite, a goddess that represented both sexes, Paul describes gentiles with the illustration of same-gender temple orgies that he knows his Jewish audience will associate negatively with idolatry. Then he turns the tables on them and points out that they, too, are sinners. Assuming everyone naturally had opposite-gender attractions, Paul says men and women left what was natural for them and burned with lust for their own sex. As a result, they became filled with envy, murder, malice, slander, insolence, hatred of God etc. Today, we realize that what is natural for heterosexuals is not natural for homosexuals. Nor are lust and other sins mentioned necessarily part of a Christian homosexual’s life. It is difficult to apply Paul’s words to committed Christian homosexuals.
1 Corinthians 6:9-11, 1 Timothy 1:8-10 In these lists of vices, Paul uses two greek words whose meaning is unclear. Malakos literally means soft. It occurs three times in the gospels as a modifier of clothing, implying a certain effeminate voluptuousness in the lifestyle of Roman oppressors. If there are sexual overtones, it may refer to male prostitutes who painted their faces and wore silken clothes to attract both male and female clients. Arsenokoitai is a combination of the words for male and coitus. This is its only use in the Bible. Found later in secular literature usually in similar lists of vices and adjacent to words of an exploitative economic nature, such as thieves and slave traders. It may refer to a pimp or to men who used male prostitutes. When these words have been translated as referring to homosexuality, a modern cultural overlay is present.
The biblical verses discussed here can be seen as referring to homosexual rape, idolatrous same-gender rites, cultic impurity, or coercive sexual practices; behaviours that can be changed. They say nothing about sexual orientation, which cannot be changed.
What are the options for a Christian Homosexual?
Heterosexual Marriage The advice often given by pastors and teachers is “Just find a nice girl/boy and get married” Would you really want your daughter or son to marry someone who is homosexual and cannot genuinely be attracted to or fully appreciate the beauty of someone of the opposite sex? Heterosexual spouses in mixed-orientation marriages usually think something is wrong with themselves – that they are not attractive enough or desirable enough, while the homosexual spouses find the stress of pretending to be something they are not eventually becomes unsustainable.
Celibacy Some church leaders advocate lifelong celibacy for homosexual members, yet, like most Protestants, we consider the requirement of life-long celibacy for Catholic Priests, even in a spiritually supportive community, to be an unnatural lifestyle. Those who attempt to maintain celibacy still struggle with feelings of guilt because of their innate desires. Vulnerable to temptation in an unguarded moment, they may experience emotional distress. Paul calls celibacy a gift, and says it is better to marry than burn. How does this advice apply to homosexuals? Research shows great health benefits, satisfaction and happiness are found in intimate relationships, resulting in longer and happier lives. As Christians, do we have the right to relegate homosexuals to shorter more stressful lives? If we deny ourselves significant, loving relationships, we are depriving ourselves the opportunity to better understand God’s love for us.
Committed Relationship Most Christian homosexuals long for a close, loving family. We want a lifetime partner with whom we can build a stable mutually satisfying life. Sexuality is a small, though important part of our lives. Like our heterosexual counterparts, we feel a responsibility to maintain chastity until commitment. Thankfully many Christians have come to support this answer, because love is the basis of the Kingdom of Heaven.
How Should We as a Church Respond?
Remember the Bible says “It is not good for humans to be alone” “Judge not, that you be not judged” “Bear one another’s burdens” and “Love your neighbour as yourself”. Our Saviour, who often chose to ‘hang out’ with the marginalized and outcasts of society, was described as not being willing to break a bruised reed or snuff out a smoldering wick.